Whew! Well caregiver family, it’s been a minute since my last blog and if you are a caregiver I am sure you understand WHY. Life happens and we have to re-prioritize things. Just when you think you have things figured out-BAM! A whole pandemic shows up and throws a monkey wrench into what you thought you knew.
For the past sixteen months, I have had to not only make sure I was keeping myself safe, but also navigate keeping a fiesty, strong-willed 72 year old woman safe (Side note: not to mention preparing an 18 year old to navigate his own safety as he went off into the world of college living). Needless to say, it has not been an easy task. I spent the first six months trying to explain to the stubborn parent I care for that “no, Ross is not open”, “no, we cannot go shopping today”, and “yes, you have to wear your mask ALL THE TIME”. Oh, the number of times I literally had to put her in the car and take her for a ride to see for herself that Ross indeed was closed (Picture below for evidence)
A lot has happened for me since the start of the pandemic. Working from home, a challenge I thought I would enjoy, but don’t-thoughts on that coming in another blog- has brought about unwanted issues, emotions, feelings, and weight gain. The outside caregiver provided to me through the state of Texas passed away, leaving me to LITERALLY be my mom’s only assistance on a daily basis. I found myself quickly slipping back into the 2013 version of self, trying to tackle it all alone. Please don’t do what I did!! It’s taken me a year and a half to re-figure out how to fully take care of me while taking care of others. If the pandemic did cause you to lose yourself, over the next few blog posts I will share a few strategies that I recently picked up to get me back, so stay tuned!!!
I look forward to following you and your journey. Like you, I am my mother’s caregiver – she lives with me…just the two of us. (I started journaling about our adventures but haven’t pushed the button to publish). Folks who don’t do it, or who can jump in and out of it don’t really understand. They mean well and do what their lives allow them to, but it’s not the same. I am working from home now, as well. It’s been good in that it has saved me a lot of money, but going days and weeks without any other interaction (phone, FaceTime excepted), is a lot. I created an impenetrable bubble when the virus started in order to keep mom safe, and it pretty much remains, with but 4 random exceptions.
I lost myself in the routine of my everyday and have had to find myself again…but, I’ve changed.
I am glad that you are writing and will share your experiences. I have five other friends who are living the same life ; we share our experiences of role reversal and having to say “no”, turning off running water, watching the same movies over again, etc.; their stories are welcome and sometimes funny additions to my writing.
While it’s good to know that I’m not alone, I will also be praying for you.
Until next time…
Hi Leslie, even if you never decide to push publish on those journals, just writing it down is therapeutic or at least it is for me.
Thanks for this ! I was my moms caregiver as she battled Alzheimer’s. She was diagnosed in 2011 and lived with us full-time since it was a mental and physical journey as her caregiver. She passed away May 13th 2021. Now my mind is trying to heal as I learn to navigate my life without her. We are empty nesters now. Trying to reconnect with my husband and my life . Bless your heart for this.
God bless you for taking care of your mom until the end. And I pray that you can now refocus on connecting with your husband!